Tag: relationship advice
4 Pieces of Dating Advice From Ted Lasso : What The Comedy Can Teach Us About Relationships.
“I think if you care about someone and you got a little love in your heart, there ain’t nothin you can’t get through together.”
Ted Lasso is one of the most talked about shows to come out in the past year, and for good reason. It’s entertaining, optimistic without being corny (except when it’s trying to be), and endlessly funny. But just being funny doesn’t get a show nominated for 20 Emmys; to do that, it has to have heart.
And boy, does Ted Lasso have heart. Oodles of hearts, actually. Whether it’s dealing with the fallout of Rebecca’s divorce or watching Ted navigate the stormy seas of his separation, the show never stops tugging at the heartstrings.
It also never skips a moment to offer some valuable life lessons like, for example, “You tore your butt. That’s nothing to be ashamed of.” Well, maybe not so much that one.
There are indeed lots of great quotes in Ted Lasso, and you could apply any of them to a million situations in your life, but these are four that stick out as excellent pieces of dating advice.
Roy Kent: “He’s fine. That’s it. Nothing wrong with that. Most people are fine. It’s not about him. It’s about why the f*** you think he deserves you. You deserve someone who makes you feel like you’ve been struck by f***ing lightning. Don’t you dare settle for fine.”
Roy Kent’s fiery, angry, profanity-laced tirade to Rebecca when he meets her “fine” date is incredibly relatable and true.
Let’s face it, if not us, we all know someone who has clearly settled in a relationship, and we don’t mean with respect to their relative physical attractiveness. More of an all-encompassing settling, like when you crave a good steak but instead stop at a McDonald’s because it’s convenient. It’s the kind of settling that makes you feel bad inside and fills you with regret in hindsight.
Keep Roy in mind. Don’t you dare settle for fine.
Ted Lasso: “Be curious, not judgmental.”
This Walt Whitman quote is everywhere, but it’s Ted’s addition that makes it really hit home: “All those fellas who used to belittle me… none of them were curious. They thought they had everything all figured out, so they judged everything. And they judged everyone.”
It’s a nice reminder that none of us have it all figured out. When you’re meeting new people, it’s good to be curious and ask questions but also not to judge them when they open up. After all, there’s probably stuff in your past you don’t love, either.
People change when they’re curious. But judgmental people never learn anything new, and it holds them back.
Be like Ted. Approach new situations—and new people—with curiosity, not judgment.
Jamie Tartt: “Coach, I’m me. Why would I want to be anything else?”
Ted Lasso: “I’m not sure you know how psychologically healthy that actually is.”
We know, Jamie Tartt is a prick, but, you know, he’s got a sad backstory, so it’s understandable? You can’t help but feel for Jamie’s character, despite his egomania. And even though this line is supposed to make us dislike Jamie, Ted’s comment after rings true. I mean, all he asked Jamie was, “Would you rather be a panda or a lion?” and Jamie’s inability to answer a hypothetical without being a total ass probably isn’t healthy, but hey, that’s showbiz, baby.
We don’t get the choice to be a panda, a lion, or anyone else, no matter how much we wish we could be. Really, we could all afford a little more self-confidence à la Tartt. Imagine approaching a situation with that mindset! I’m me. Why would I want to be anything else?
Take it from Jamie. Embrace yourself for who you are, and let pandas be pandas and lions be lions.
Sam Obisanya: “We gave it everything we had. And for me, that is okay because what’s worse is not to try at all. To try is scary, you know, because you can end up losing a lot. But you have to put your heart out there. Otherwise, what’s the point?”
The soft-spoken and wise-beyond-his-years Sam provides this poignant statement at a press conference after his team’s heart-breaking loss to Man City. Also, these words seem to cause Rebecca to finally see Sam in a different light and become open to romance with him.
Sam’s words also ring true for all of us who are too scared to date due to a fear of getting hurt. Yes, it’s brutal if we put ourselves out there and there isn’t a happy ending. But if we don’t open our hearts, we may never experience the mind-blowing possibilities. And without that, what’s the point? So go ahead and take a chance: put your heart out there.
And if you need more heart-filled inspirational moments, go stream season two of Ted Lasso on Apple TV+.
Sorry Not Sorry: Being Unvaccinated is the Biggest Dating Dealbreaker.
This really shouldn’t be surprising.
Online dating is all about first impressions — people don’t want to waste time talking to someone they’d never want to meet in person. But before you actually meet up in person, you’re probably going to ask some basic questions to get to know them better and to see if you may be compatible IRL. Questions like “What do you do for work?” or “What do you like to do outside of work?”
(more…)What to Expect From Dating in the Metaverse?
Spoiler: It’s not the real deal
In his own, um, charming way, Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg has been touting the “Metaverse” as the new way we’re all going to be interacting with the internet and each other. You can hang out with friends in VR, relax in VR, vacation in VR, and even work in VR!
The end goal is that you’ll be able to do anything in the Metaverse that you could do in real life and more — and, for better or worse, that likely means dating, too.
Probably for the gamers, dating in the Metaverse seems like a logical and exciting development, but for the rest of us, could, and should, Meta-dating be a substitute for real-life romantic connections?
First, let’s explore one of the main supposed selling points of Meta-dating: safety. Some people suggest that the Metaverse will remove the risks associated with in-person dates. At FFWD, we’re all about safety – heck, we build our entire product around it – but it seems counterintuitive that you can eliminate risk by creating an additional facade behind which your date can hide their true persona. On the contrary, this seems to offer more opportunities for catfishing, if not worse (accounts of sexual offenses in meta space seems to suggest that dangerous behavior may be undertaken with more impunity where you have the technological facade to barricade you against real-world consequences).
We think safety can only be assured when you show the real-life person off the bat, so that your real-life intuition can be invoked. And unless you plan to stay in the Meta-world in perpetuity (no judgment, gamers), you’re better off knowing sooner rather than later who’s the person behind the online persona.
Another “benefit” of Meta-dating is convenience. Sure, putting on a headset is way more efficient than getting ready for a real date but is that really a good thing? If the pandemic has taught us anything, it’s that going out into the real world should not be taken for granted. Also, if you can’t be bothered to spend a little time getting ready and dressed for a real-world date (or half-dressed for a Zoom date), then you’re probably not that interested in the person or dating overall. There, we said it.
Next, let’s consider the actual experience of VR dating.
Now, we’ve seen how dating changed during the pandemic, and with a lot of people going on Zoom dates, a Metaverse date might not seem that weird. Still, there’s some version of realism and intimacy with Zoom dating. You’re still face-to-face, in a sense. You still get a glimpse of the real life person, bits of their vibes and their real-life quirks.
In the Metaverse, though, you make an avatar. A cartoonish avatar. Of course, people have been making online avatars for decades in online games like RuneScape, Club Penguin, Second Life, but it makes us wonder, can you still experience the same vibes and body language quirks we identify in the real-world, or even Zoom, dates?
We think the answer lies in the pudding. And we’re not talking about the heavily-rendered ads Meta has been running on TV, but actual recordings of the Metaverse in its current form.
Here, take a look:
The Wall Street Journalist in the video describes the avatars as “trippy little LEGO-looking people.” Bottom line, as of now, the Metaverse is jank.
Even if, in time, Meta perfects the tools of its Metaverse to make you look more realistic, we still make the argument that the Metaverse can’t create the same feeling of intimacy that’s inherent with in-person dating.
It doesn’t replicate the experience itself: the pre-date jitters, the quick check of your hair in your phone’s camera, the first glimpse of someone walking toward you, the smell of their hair, the warmth of their hand on your arm.
These things can’t be replicated virtually, not until we live in a Ready Player One world — and we’re not sure that’s what we want (ever). There’s too much value and beauty in the real world to replace it with a virtual one entirely, and even those nervous feelings we experience when we’re dating add value.
Looking into someone’s eyes is a luxury reserved for the real world.
We wouldn’t have it any other way.