The Juice & the Squeeze

Fall is the perfect time to go on a date. The weather is cooling down, the leaves are changing color, and getting out of the house isn’t a miserable, uncomfortable, sweaty time (note: we’re in the Northeast; it gets very humid). It’s also finally #SpookySzn, which means lots of candy, horror movies, and Halloween activities—especially haunted houses. 

Haunted Houses are one of the most popular Halloween pastimes. As America Haunts points out, we enjoy being scared as long as we know we’re not in any real danger, which is why we’re (largely) fine watching a horror movie in a comfy chair with some popcorn but still can’t look in the mirror when we get up in the middle of the night to pee. Just saying, if you don’t look in the mirror, nothing can pop up behind you in it. 

But knowing you’re safe doesn’t make it any less scary when a clown pops out from behind a wall, or someone with a chainsaw chases you down a dirt path. Know what’s even more frightening than clowns, though? First dates.

“Let’s go to a haunted house,” they said. “It’ll be fun,” they said. Now, not only are you worried about spooky scary skeletons, but you’re also worried about impressing your date, and let’s face it, those shrieks and the string of obscenities you’ll mouth after aren’t exactly impressive. 

Don’t worry. We’ve got you covered. Below, you’ll find a list of our top five tips for keeping it cool in a haunted house.

1. Walk Behind a Group of Teenage Girls

When actors train for their roles in a haunted house, they are told how to scare people. Scare the middle of the group. Be on the lookout for people who seem easy to scare. Well, trust us, there’s no one more commonly targeted in haunted houses than groups of teenage girls. 

If you’re walking through the haunted house behind a group of teenage girls, nobody’s going to jump out at you. They’re going to jump out at the girls in front of you, either giving you time to prepare for the thing lurking around the corner or skipping you altogether. Plus, if you still get scared, you can probably quickly cover it up by laughing at the terrified reactions happening in front of you.

Gen Z, we thank you for being our shields in haunted houses.

2. Liquid Courage

We should disclaim that this only applies to readers over 21 years old, and of course, you should drink responsibly and not get behind the wheel of a car if you’ve been drinking. 

Now that that’s out of the way, there’s a reason it’s called “liquid courage.” Getting a little bit of alcohol in your system can help boost your confidence in the short term. Ha!, you might think to yourself, that rubber mask didn’t scare me at all! I’m invincible! 

Of course, if you overdo it, you might end up getting more scared, but what’s life without some risks?

3. Just Have Fun

Haunted houses are supposed to be fun. Dates are supposed to be fun. Maybe appearing brave isn’t the most important thing. If you’re looking to form a real connection with someone, you shouldn’t have to hide away parts of yourself—even your crippling fear of clowns. For all you know, they might find it endearing or even cute. 

The most important thing you can do on a date is let loose, be yourself, and enjoy the time you’re spending with someone else. Besides, nothing in the house is actually going to hurt you; everyone’s there to have a good time, so let yourself have a good time.